26 July, 2006

Lesson #8- Airplanes

Don’t act surprised drinks are free in first class.
Wear grey to avoid noticeable stains that may occur in-flight.
Make sure to buy a reputable magazine/newspaper preflight to loudly ruffle, annoying the person next to you. NY Times, WS Journal, The Economist will all do nicely. If a conversation is sparked with a fellow passenger, make sure you reference trips to other exotic places every chance you get. Speak to them like they’ve never traveled or been in a plane before. If they haven’t tell them about all the things that can possible go wrong in the plane, resulting in disaster. Send drinks back to the stewardesses or “flight attendants” often, and treat them like they are waitresses in an all-night rest stop diner on the outskirts of Mobile, AL.

Wait, this may be a post about how to be an asshole while traveling. Oh well, learn it well and use it anyway.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Slovin is wearing a linen suit by Canali Milano, a cotton shirt by Ike Behar, a silk tie by Bill Blass and cap-toed leather lace-ups from Brooks Brothers. I'm wearing a lightweight linen suit with pleated trousers, a cotton shirt, a dotted silk tie, all by Valentino Couture, and perforated cap-toe leather shoes by Allen-Edmonds. My haircut is slightly better than his, although his is a very expensive one....


Nice blog slovin, very entertaining. don't feed any stray cats to any ATM machines though.

The Count said...

Well, I'm no patrick bateman. He is the epitome of class...

Bitter Beard Face said...

I'm trying to read American Psycho in spanish right now. It's hard. But it helps when you already know the book. I just pretend to understand it, and then remember what's really happening. Like when you were a kid and you couldn't read, but you already had the book memorized from storytime with Mom, so you just recited it as you blankly turned the pages.

Anonymous said...

Does spanish have multiple words for 'white'? I'm thinking of course about the chapter about business cards. "Ivory, Bone, etc."

The Count said...

I think most of them were beige, or off-white. What made them cool was the embossing and raised letters and font and junk. Of course, I have all of these in my business cards