Du Hast

Disclaimer-In my nature of being stubborn, I will be typing this post as if I were typing on an American keyboard. These are not typos...mainly.

I am sitting here in mz office at the IIHL, the International Institute of Humanitarian Law, and I have the most unbelievable view. I am right in front of a window overlooking the whole citz with the alps in the background. Unfortunatelz, todaz is kind of gross and the mountains are mostlz covered in clouds. I am hoping it doesnt rain tomorrow, because I wanted to take a long hike in the Juras, which are a smaller mountain range just outside of Geneva in France.

Saturdaz morning I am going to Luyern (damnit, actuallz its Luzern) with some friends, Ashlez, Shirin, and Kevin. We booked a 3 star hotel for cheaper than the hostel, but Kevin and I have to sneak in later on. Eric told me about a hike called the Grand Round on top of Mt. Pilatus, but I think its not open until Maz. However, thez do have the worlds steepest cog railwaz in the world with the last car being made entirelz of glass so zou can see all down the mountain as zour climbing up. Should be a great hike, but a bit cold. Thez also have a casino there where we will hang out at night. I wish I had brought a tuxedo so badlz right now. I plan on onlz plazing a few games of blackjack, onlz as much as I would be spending on drinks for that night, and if I lose I wont drink. If I win, I maz have a celebratorz drink, but Iàd like to keep anz excess monez that roll mz waz.

I just booked a flight to Lisbon for just over 100 CHF(swiss francs), which was a great deal. That will be in late March, I am verz excited for that trip. As for now, I should get back to doing the work that thez havent given me zet, apparentlz I found the most laid back internship in Geneva, the last interns here said thez didnt have enough to do most of the time. I did bring mz Ipood, so I think iàll listen to Bob Dzlanàs £most of the Time now£.

Debriefing- Reallz, onlz the zs and the ys are displaced on these kezboards, as well as the placements of commas and other grammatical tools. Still annozing.

Some Pictures for those w/o FB

The Beautiful view from atop Castle Chillon in Montreaux


A foggy morning nearby where I live


The market in Ferney, France

Prix

Prices in Geneva are ridiculous. Everything is on the Swiss Franc and they decided that things should cost 3 times as much as they normally should here. A pint of beer costs around 7-9 CHF (Swiss Franc), which is insane. On saturday morning myself and 3 friends decided we should walk to France, when you could easily take the bus. It took around 35 minutes, but was well worth it. There was an open air market in the town, Ferney-Voltaire, and the stalls were filled with beautiful fruits, cheeses, meats, wines, etc. There were oranges almost as big as your head, which was odd. It only cost 2 Euros for 2 Kilos of kiwis, which ended up being around 15 large kiwis, an amazing deal. Also, concerning Peanut Butter: Reckman told me that peanut butter in Europe was gross. I told everyone here the same thing. Someone bought it anyway and there happens to be nothing wrong with it, besides it being expensive. So, either PB is only gross in France, or it is only normal in Geneva.

Bonjour/Gutentag

Hello friends, enemies, family, vagabonds. Today was my 2nd day in Geneva, CH, and I am loving it here. I have not uploaded any pics to my computer yet, so you will have to wait for some of those. Last night I went to a local bar with 3 other guys and 3 girls from the program. Everthing here is a good walk from the John Knox centre where I live, but I love the countryside - you can see both the Juras and the Alps from the front door of the centre. I took a run this morning at 630 with the guys I went to the bar with, and it was maybe one of the harder things Ive done in a while. I didnt vomit afterwards, which is progress for me. We watched a bit of the sunrise over the alps at the end of about a 2 1/2 mile jog. Although I felt a bit woozy and shakey afterward,but the cold shower felt amazing. Today we went to the US Mission, The UN, the Red Cross Museum. Nothing too special, but it was interesting. I got an ID for the UN library with my picture on it, and ate in the UN cafeteria. I dont have much time now, dinner is in a bit and I have to change. The cook, Jose, is a Spaniard and speaks no english, only french and spanish. He roasted a whole lamb, so I am looking forward to it. Latas.

Lesson #8- Airplanes

Don’t act surprised drinks are free in first class.
Wear grey to avoid noticeable stains that may occur in-flight.
Make sure to buy a reputable magazine/newspaper preflight to loudly ruffle, annoying the person next to you. NY Times, WS Journal, The Economist will all do nicely. If a conversation is sparked with a fellow passenger, make sure you reference trips to other exotic places every chance you get. Speak to them like they’ve never traveled or been in a plane before. If they haven’t tell them about all the things that can possible go wrong in the plane, resulting in disaster. Send drinks back to the stewardesses or “flight attendants” often, and treat them like they are waitresses in an all-night rest stop diner on the outskirts of Mobile, AL.

Wait, this may be a post about how to be an asshole while traveling. Oh well, learn it well and use it anyway.

Lesson #7- Drinking

Always have a drink in hand. I’m talking mixed drink long-island-martini-gin-tonic-whiskey style. It should always be your second or third drink, leaving the first drink to be consumed before you arrive at the event, and if the first is not consumed, it ought to be thrown on the waiter that brought it. It doesn’t matter why, they’ll bring you another, which we’ll count as your second. You are never allowed to be sloppy drunk until you have retired; this is the benefit of the elderly.
Preferable drinks for men: Scotch, Bourbon, Martinis, Wine. Beer is only allowed on several conditions. 1. It must be imported. 2. It must be in a new glass, drinking from can or bottle is unacceptable. 3. It must be a small brand. The beer must be from a story of your travels, Heineken and Guinness are good examples of what not to drink.
Preferable drinks for women: Wine, Martinis, Margaritas (only in right climate-zone), Long-Island Iced Tea, Vodka Tonic, Gin Tonic. Wine coolers are strictly banned for a lack of class, and if ANY person ever orders a White Zinfandel, they should be shot on site. Of course, there are other drinks people may consume, such as the Mojito, or an Amaretto Sour, but these are usually reserved for occasions, which are excused.
If a female has any of the drinks listed for men, she is 1. Confused (sexually) 2. The owner of a dead palate 3. Hammered, which means she must be retired.

Lesson #6- Sporting: Part 1

Choosing which sport to indulge in can be very difficult. There are so many which require a certain amount of respectability to be able to participate. Polo, for instance must be played on horseback, and certainly not in a pool dirtied by your cousin's urine and that old guy who sits in the corner constantly applying SPF 65 to his leathery skin. Fencing ought to be considered in the top tiers of respectable sporting, given the historical amount of mustachioed fencers, and it is a lot, trust me. I myself have dabbled in fencing for several years and I am quite handy with an epee. Now that we are on the subject, there are 3 types of blades in fencing.
-Foil -– Usually has an ornate handle that is held like a pistol, called the pistol grip. A French grip is often just a straight handle under the bell guard. With the foil, the hit zone is the mid-body, with everything above the waist and below the neck, excluding arms.
-Epee -– The epee has a hit zone of every spot on the body, including the back, and the head. This is one reason it is my favourite. The epee is slightly more flexible of a blade, which can allow for whipping the tip upon an opponents hand over and under the bell guard.
-Sabre -– The sabre would be my least favorite and efficient mode of fencing. The hit zone includes everything above the waist. I dislike this weapon because of the style of attack. The sabre is a curved weapon, which is not conducive to thrust-stab, attacks like the foil and epee. With the sabre, slashing and cutting motions are preferred, creating entirely different styles of defense.